- Loving Wives
- She Cheated with Her Ex Ch. 01
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Click hereIt's mid-morning Sunday; my friend Ken has unexpectedly arrived at my place.
"Ken! You look terrible! What's wrong? What's happened?"
"Alan, the bastard. He fucked Ella. She cheated. She cheated with that bastard. Of all people. Him!"
"No. Alan fucked her? Are you sure? She gave him up a year or so before you got married. How do you know she cheated?"
"She told me. Last night. In bed. We had sex - nah, it was better than that. We made love. It was best ever. And then afterwards she started crying and she told me."
"What did she say? When did it happen?"
"It was while you and I were at the cricket yesterday. She had gone over to Tony and Fran's place with a few friends swimming in their pool, and he was there. He said he would bring her home afterwards but they went to his place and he fucked her there. She said she should have stopped him but she didn't."
"Did she tell you any more than that? Did she say why she let him do it?"
"I don't think so. I probably wouldn't have heard her if she did anyhow. She was crying and I was shouting at her and I went and spent the night in the spare room. She was gone this morning. I don't know when she left or where she went. Probably to her mother's place or Fran's. Most likely Fran's - Fran's her best friend. She wouldn't be silly enough to go back to fucknuckle's place."
"I know the sun's not over the yardarm yet, but I think this calls for something from the medicine cabinet. Laphroaig?"
"Yeah. Thanks. A big one. How many bottles have you got?"
"OK, so have you thought about what you're going to do about Ella?"
"No. I know what I'd like to do about that other bastard though. I'd kill the arsehole if I got my hands on him. But Ell, no. I don't know what to do about her. That's why I came here before I did anything else. I thought if I talked to you first, at least I'm less likely to do something stupid that I'll regret later."
"Yeah. Fair enough. Good thinking. Look, I've been friends with Ella and Alan since we were kids together and you've become a really good mate since your family moved here. I don't want to lose any of you as friends - not even Al the silly bugger. So anything I can do to help, I will.
"But anyhow, if I'm hearing you right, at least you're prepared to listen to what Ella has to say before you make any decisions about this?"
"Not yet I'm not. If she was here now it would be just the same as last night. I've got to work out what to say to her and how to say it so that she tells me the truth about what happened and why she cheated on me."
"You really want to know."
"I want to know why she did it. I don't want to know the gory details of what they did together. They fucked. That's enough of what they did. I want to know why she let him do it. After she dumped him she said I was a much better man than Alan could ever hope to be and she couldn't work out what she saw in him in the first place."
"Lots of us never understood what she saw in him as a boyfriend. He's fun in a group, but he's always been totally irresponsible."
"Yeah. Well what she did was bloody irresponsible too. We had our first wedding anniversary last week and we had a great time together and now she does this. Why? What the hell could have given her the idea to do it? Everybody knows what lamebrain is like, he's always trying it on. Why the fuck did she let him do it?"
"But then at least she told you that she had done it. It wasn't as though you caught her. She confessed, so she's obviously feeling horribly guilty about it."
"She must have been. After she does it with him, she comes home and does it with me. And she did it like she really loved me. Like I said, last night it was the best ever. She was really working at it. It must have been her feeling guilty. . . . . . Ahh shit!"
"What?"
"Shit. She's had that bastard's cock inside her and then she comes home and I've done it with her straight afterwards."
"That's not new. You've done exactly that before and laughed about it."
"But we weren't married then."
"It's still only two cocks one after the other in one cunt. No difference, really."
"It is different. It's different when the cunt is married to one of the cocks. It's different when the cunt is supposed to be forsaking all other cocks. I don't know that I could ever have sex with her again. She's damaged goods."
"Now that's an interesting statement. So does that mean that even if you forgive her and take her back, there will be no sex from now on? Think about it. What happens then?"
"Nah. That's not going to work, is it."
"That's what I reckon."
"So what do you think I should do?"
"I reckon the first thing to do is to stop worrying about what she did and get her to tell you why she did it. She let you down. When she dumped him and married you, you both agreed to love each other. So far as you're concerned, a wife who loves her husband doesn't let the ex-boyfriend fuck her."
"She doesn't do lots of other things with him either, if she really loves me."
"That's what I'm trying to say too. There were a lot of things she did with him before she married you that you would upset yourself about if she did them now. Sex is just one of them and probably not even the most important one."
"It's important to me."
"I understand that. But like I said, the sex is really no different from before you married her. It's a cock in a cunt. It's been in there before. That's why you have to try to get her to say why she did it. We know why she did it before - she loved sex. We know why she shouldn't do it now. But we don't know why she did do it now, and I'd bet that she doesn't know either."
"If it's like you say and she doesn't know why, then how is she going to tell me? It'll be a waste of time asking her."
"That depends on how you ask. If you ask the wrong way, all you will get is an excuse that she thinks up when you put her on the spot. Either that, or she'll just say she doesn't know why. That won't help."
"I know. Then I'll start shouting again and she'll start crying. We're back where we started."
"Maybe see a professional? Have you thought about counselling?"
"I haven't thought about anything much apart from her and him and how she could be so bloody heartless. I don't even know if I want her back anyhow, now, after what she did. I need to sort myself out before we see someone to try and get us back together."
"I don't think a decent relationships counsellor would just be trying to get you back together. They try to help you work out what's best for both of you. There's no sense in getting back together if it's not going to work and you're both resenting it."
"Do you know of any good ones?"
* * * * *
That evening, Ella drops around for Conversation 2. It will be submitted for publication in a couple of days' time.
- COMMENTS
Realist comment about therapy being more expensive than a divorce. First, you need to find out reasons for Ella doing what she did, work on some form of closure for Kent and then work on ways to reestablish trust and strengthen the relationship between Ella and Kent. For there to be trust, both parties need at the very least to communicate honestly. Trust, communication and honesty are 3 simple words but takes a lot of time, effort and commitment for it to work. And there is no guarantee this will end well. Therapy sessions will most likely last longer than the duration of the marriage and not be covered by insurance. One year marriage, if you can agree on no fault and division of community assets (there won’t be a massive amount), you might even get away with filling in all the forms without a lawyer (provided the courts allow self representation)
I worded my comment on the difference between men and women viewing the act of cheating badly. What I should have said is when men get caught, they normally point to the act of cheating as a physical act and that there is no emotional attachment with the party they cheated with. Men when they find their partner cheating, normally get upset by the physical act of cheating. (I then drew the conclusion, rightly or wrongly that men find it easier to distinguish between the physical and emotional act of cheating). Women, on the other hand, when they find out about their partner cheating get upset not only by the physical act of cheating but also the emotional act of cheating (e.g. partner constantly texting/communicating with a third party, a case of physically with you but mentally somewhere else). (Infidelity is normally the last straw that breaks an already weak relationship, women getting upset by both the physical and emotional act of cheating could well be acknowledging the existing weak relationship.)
Wives accept infidelity (willing or otherwise) by their husbands because of the children and/or for financial reasons (especially if they are not working). That does not mean they forgive and forget. I have heard stories of women, who after the kids have left home, hook up with friends with benefits and then have unprotected sex in the marital bed in the late afternoon or early evening, thus ensuring the husband gets sloppy seconds. These stories are invariably told by the friends with benefit.
Husband, I do agree are less able to accept their wives wonderings. But once they get acquainted with the reality of divorce settlements today (assuming you live in a more progressive country), there is more grudging acceptance. None of the above can be scientifically proven, it is a matter of observation and drawing, rightly or wrongly, conclusions.
Lastly, Cuck: A Voyeristic Cuckold is too well balanced.
Re Anonymous comment:
"getting a divorce will be less expensive than therapy"
Is this an economist commenting?
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Anonymous, I agree with your comment about there being a spectrum from recreational to relational sex. I have known a few people with FWB arrangements (single people and married people) who had a relationship, but not one that was fully committed and loving as I believe a marriage should be. Those that had both a committed marriage relationship as well as the FWB arrangement provided the models for characters in some of my stories.
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Your comment about men and women and the ways in which they distinguish between the emotional and physical act of "cheating" is perhaps debatable. My reading suggests that wives accept (willingly or otherwise) their husbands' infidelities more often than men accept wives' wanderings. Certainly LW husbands of the BTB persuasion demand unwavering obedience from the woman they believe they own.
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I wrote the Ken and Ella saga to point out the difference between the physical and the emotional. Both accept that what Ella did was a breach of trust. The 'friend' has a different view and expresses it, but it would be inappropriate to try to impose that view on the couple.
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Again, thanks for the comment and for following the thread of my stories.
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Lue
This is an attempt to answer the question Lue posted as to what constitutes cheating. Looking at the comments, it is the physical act of cheating that is condemned rather than the emotional act of cheating
I would leave out the procreational element of sex and go with the following definitions: sex with emotional attachment and commitment (relational sex), physical attraction and sex without emotional attachment and commitment (recreational sex). (My definitions may not coincide with Lue’s)
At one end of the spectrum, recreational sex could be an act with an anonymous person you pick up drunk. There may well be no physical attraction between both parties. (This is getting laid for the sake of getting laid and is one-off.) It is not that easy to fit sex into distinct categories. When the anonymous person is no longer anonymous, the physical attraction between the parties exceeds that with their respective significant others and the hook-ups become regular, both parties are likely to develop emotional attachments.
Men in general are better at distinguishing between the emotional and physical act of cheating, hence not surprisingly more likely to commit the physical act of cheating without much soul searching. Women are more likely to consider cheating as both a physical and emotional act (e.g. the time spent and closeness with third party perceived to be emotional cheating), though I have noticed the younger generation of women are more able to distinguish between the physical and emotional act of cheating (I have always wondered if motherhood has an impact.) I cannot quote studies to back these statements, they are just observations.
Ken and Ella both appear to understand that their relationship were exclusive. If I read part 2 of the story correctly, Ella considered sex with Alan to be a physical act of cheating, the scary part was however her reason (she momentarily forgot that she married). Could one infer that Ella is perhaps not ready to settle down? Would counseling help? Maybe but it is very expensive and given they have been married only a year, getting a divorce will be less expensive than therapy
For mine, it was one of the best stories in the LW category.
It showed how easy it is for people to jump to conclusions when judging other people's behaviour.
My experiment here in conversation format was not entirely successful, but I was reasonably happy with the way it was able to illustrate the points I was trying to make in its two brief chapters.
Lue