How to Eat an Elephant Ch. 04

We giggled like schoolgirls.

We were like a super-secret sorority, one in which you could only get membership by exclusive invitation and after passing a rigorous initiation ceremony. In our case, we were bound together by much more than secret vows and blood initiations. We were bound by a history we shared.

Each of us had slept with our own son, and each of us knew the others had done it. Yeah, you talk about a shared secret.

We agreed that in each of our cases, the end result had been gratifying. Oh, sure, the sex was good, but we were all beyond middle age and sex wasn't the be-all, end-all it might have been when we were in our 30s. Having sex with our own sons was gratifying because it deepened an already deep Mother/Son bond, and because it seemed to have made our sons better men.

Having such knowledge made us want to proselytize everyone we knew. Imagine if you had a secret cure for cancer. You'd want to share it with everyone you knew, right? So we started going through the names of friends who were having trouble with their sons, and could use the cure. Sarah and I had many mutual friends. Bonnie, living in another subdivision, shared some of our friends, while having her own circle. Needless to say, the field was ripe with potential candidates.

We had several decisions to make, before we did anything. The first decision was, "Are we really serious about this?" The best thing for each of us to do would be to forget any of this had ever happened and go on with our lives, hoping our secret remained inviolate. We talked about it, and it seemed so simple, really. Every Mother had problems with her son, at one time or another, and so every Mother could benefit from what we knew. How could we not share that? Sure, there would be risks involved, but we would only engage with women we knew well enough to trust, so we thought the risk could be mitigated. Of course, once a woman became a member of the club through the secret "initiation" rite, she'd keep our secrets because she would have her own to protect.

The real question was, "Are we going to involve our sons?" For the three of us, that decision was not so difficult. We didn't know if they had talked about it, but clearly Jim and Bill knew each had been sleeping with his own Mother. Since Bonnie and Sammy had, well, consummated the act in a tent beside us all, Sammy was in on it, too.

"But girls, let's be honest," Bonnie said. "Our sons are really the weak links."

We all laughed, but what Bonnie said was true. Sarah piped up. "That's the problem. We have a very real risk of exposure and absolute humiliation, and worse, if one of them even makes a peep about this. I trust you two, but I'm not sure I trust all our sons to keep their mouths shut."

We looked at each other, and you could see the suspicion in each of our eyes.

"Stop it," said Sarah. "We have to believe we can trust our own sons to protect us. Plus, we have to know we can control them. Isn't that what this is all about, anyway? Using the ultimate leverage to help them become better men?"

So we agreed we would bring the boys into the group, at least at the start to see if it worked out.

Because James, Sarah's husband, was going to be out of town the next weekend, we agreed to meet at Sarah's and that each Mother was responsible for ensuring her own son's attendance. It may sound simple, but that was really a first test of the effectiveness of our "cure" for what ailed our sons. Think about it. If any of us, without the extra influence we had on our son, had said, "Honey, I'd like you to go with me next weekend to a Mothers' meeting," she would have been met with derision and scorn. Now, though, all three of us fully expected our Sons would do what we asked.

There was quite a bit of awkwardness when we got together. The guys went to the den to play video games (sigh), while we women gathered in the kitchen. Finally, Bonnie said, "Let's get this show going. We know why we're here."

We called the sons in, gave them glasses of wine since we were already into it, and then went into the den. It was kind of cute how the sons naturally sat with their Moms. Could you have imagined that a month ago? Bonnie and Sam were snuggled closely together, with Bonnie giggling.

Sarah cleared her throat. "Do you guys know why we all got together?"

I looked at Bill's face, started laughing, and then it spread to Sarah and Bonnie.

"No, no! No way. That's not going to happen. Ever!," Sarah said through her laughter.

Jim blurted, "What? What are you talking about?"

Sarah gave him a stern look. "I know what every one of you was thinking, and I'm telling you, this is not going to be some kind of Mother swapping group. Just ain't going to happen."

That caused pretty uproarious laughter from everyone. They're men. Of course that's what they were thinking. I did get a little tingle, though, when I saw Jim looking right at me. Hmmm. Wonder what Jim was thinking?

"No, boys," Sarah continued. "We just thought we should clear the air and we do have something to propose to you. Not that!," she emphasized again.

I jumped in. "We all know that each one of us now shares a special relationship. It's something that has to be a forever secret, but it's something we each will cherish, all our lives. Do you agree?"

The sons nodded enthusiastically. They knew exactly what I was saying.

"Do you guys agree that you have better relationships with us, and that it's made you better men?"

Again, the nods.

"We think so, too. We have what every Mother wants - your love. Now, wouldn't it be nice if in very select cases we helped other Moms and Sons come together?"

At that, Billy snorted in his wine. OK. I'd give him that one. I did kind of open the door, I guess. Everyone looked from Bill to me, and then we all started laughing again.

"Too much information, Vic, but do you have any tips for that?" Sarah said, and we all laughed again.

Jim said, "Sure, Vic. I think we'd all be on board with that. You got someone in mind?"

Sarah jumped in. "Lisa and Chris. Bonnie, you and Sammy don't know them, but Lisa is a good friend of ours, and I think she and Christopher could use some help. He looks at her like a moonstruck calf, but he's about as cold with her as Jim was with me."

Jim looked down at the floor. "Mom, I always loved you, you know that. I was just afraid of you."

Sarah continued. "I don't know how we'll broach it with Lisa, but I know they are perfect candidates for an improved relationship."

Bonnie jumped in. "How about this, Sarah? You and Victoria could take Lisa to lunch and kind of break the ice. I don't know how, but you'll figure it out. Then maybe next weekend we could have a cookout and see how things go. I think if any woman sees how close we are with our sons now, she'd want to know how we did it. We could go from there. If it seems right, maybe we could give a few hints, or something."

"Let's back up a bit," I said. "I'm really interested in this, and how it happens. Bill, you think you seduced me, right? So, I know it's embarrassing, but it's also hot as hell. Explain how you think we got to this point, you and I. Then I'll give you my perspective."

Billy looked nervously at Jim, and then I was surprised to see him glance at Sarah. "Mom, I don't want you to misunderstand, but it was easy. Wait, wait. I'm not saying you were easy, but getting where I wanted to be with you was easy. It's kind of like eating an elephant, you know?"

Bonnie snorted, and looked at Sammy. "Yeah, I know how to eat an elephant," she laughed. I looked down at Sammy's crotch and it did look like that young man was sporting a tool to be proud of.

"No, what do you mean, Bill?"

"You eat an elephant one bite at a time. I've wanted you for years. I think every son wants his Mother. But if I had told you exactly what I wanted, you would have slapped me and thrown me into therapy. So, I took it one bite at a time. My goal was to make you feel loved."

"You did a good job of that, Billy," and I kissed him.

"Oooh," someone said, but my eyes were closed.

Bill continued. "The hardest part was to get you to start looking at me as a man with sexual desires, and not just your little boy. Once I had that planted in your brain, I think it went pretty smoothly." He laughed. "Of course, hearing Jim and Sarah going at it like rabbits didn't hurt."

I looked around the room. Everyone's attention was focused on Bill's story. "OK. Here's how it went from my perspective. I'm going to be honest, and I hope no one is shocked. I just think we need to know exactly how this all worked for us."

I continued. "You wanted me to view you as a sexual creature. Honey, that was never a problem. I saw you sporting erections from the time you were in high school. I know you checked out my panties in the dirty clothes every day. I know you tried to feel me up on more than one occasion. Knowing you were a man with desires was never the problem."

I looked around the room. The women were nodding, while the guys looked confused. "Ah, Venus and Mars," I thought to myself. I continued, "There is nothing I wouldn't do for you, Bill, or give you. Nothing. I knew what you wanted. Every Mother knows what her son wants. We are afraid to give it to you, because we don't want to screw you up psychologically. I think the psychologists lie to us, though. Now I'm not talking about when you were a kid. I'm talking about the man you are now. Do you think what we've done is screwing you up in the head?"

Bill laughed. "Just the opposite."

"I know. Me, too. I think what screws us up is not what we want, but that we try to deny it because society tells us it's creepy and taboo. So, Moms might have the same desires you do, but we're the strong ones and we fight it. I always thought it was a passing thing with you, and if I just held out long enough, you'd lose interest. Once you convinced me that you truly loved me and wanted me for the long haul, and that you weren't just looking to get laid, I was yours."

Sarah and Bonnie looked at Jim and Sam. "Yeah. What she said," they echoed. Bonnie added, "Exactly. I always knew what Sammy wanted. As long as I thought he just wanted sex, I could deny that I felt the same way. I could get sex when I wanted it, from anywhere."

Sam interrupted. "Moooom?"

She continued, laughing. "Well, from almost anywhere. You were so distant with me, though, Sam. You'd barely talk to me, and then from nowhere you'd show up and try to grab my butt. How do you think that made me feel? Do you think that made me feel loved, or do you think it made me feel like you had no respect for me at all?"

Sam was clearly touched by what Bonnie said. "Mom, I always loved you. I was afraid. I was afraid to show you love, and I was confused. I didn't know how to show you love without it being sexual. When I saw how natural and open Jim and Bill were with their Moms, I figured it out."

"Well, you should have figured it out on your own. Once you showed me that you loved me and that it wasn't just a physical thing, I was yours. Just like Vic said. I was yours from that moment. You guys may think it's a bite at a time, but it's a process. You have to show us you love us, and then we'll show you how to love us. Make sense?"

Jim jumped in. "Men want sex, and sometimes love is a part of it. Women want love, and sometimes sex is a part of it. You can have sex without love, but not with your Mother. Love has to be the primary focus between a Mother and Son, and maybe sex will be a part of that. Does that sum it up?"

Sarah looked at him, and the love in her face was obvious. "Jim, you're not just a pretty face, are you?"

So, we knew how it had worked for us. We just had to be able to communicate it to other Mothers, while minimizing the risk we'd incur if we disclosed too much, too soon.

On Wednesday, Sarah and I took Lisa to lunch. As always, our conversations got around to the kids, and Sarah and I practically gushed about how close we were with Jim and Bill now. I showed Lisa a selfie Bill and I took at our hike, and Bill was hugging me closely in the photo.

"Wow. How did you do that? Give him some sort of secret elixir, or something?"

Sarah and I looked at each other. This might be easier than we thought.

"Well, Lisa," Sarah said in a low voice. "There is a certain leverage a Mother has with her son, you know."

"No, I don't know. What? You refused to do his laundry anymore?," Lisa laughed.

We looked at Lisa. She had always been a beautiful woman, and had aged wonderfully. Her long brown hair, now streaked with gray, was below her shoulders, but when she wore it in a ponytail she looked like a damned teen-ager. Lisa's crowning glory was not her hair, though. It was her breasts. Lisa was, to use a word, endowed. Whenever we had family pool parties, Lisa was always the center of masculine attention, by both husbands and sons.

"You do have assets, Lisa. You just have to employ them, I guess," I said.

Lisa laughed. "The only secret asset I have are these," she said as she used her arms to squeeze her breasts together.

"Exactly!," Sarah crowed. "Exactly."

Lisa laughed, and then stopped when she noticed that neither Sarah nor I were laughing with her. "Wait! What? Are you saying...?"

"We're not saying anything, Lisa. We're just saying that once you get Christopher's attention and get him focused, you might be amazed at the positive changes you can work."

"Do you know I think he's been trying to cop feels of my butt lately?" Lisa laughed. "At 24, I thought he was going to enter a monastery. All he does is go to work, eat pizza, and play video games. I don't think he's had a date since Amanda, and that was high school. Poor kid must be hard up if he has to resort to rubbing his own Mom's butt."

Sarah and I looked at each other, each thinking the same thing. "This is going to be easier than we thought." Then I voiced those exact words to Lisa, and she shook her head.

"You girls are crazy. Have you been eating magic brownies at breakfast, or something?"

I answered her. "No, Lisa. We're just realistic. How do you control any man? You use your God-given gifts, don't you? Don't tell me you don't use those things to get your husband to shave on the weekend or to get your car into the shop. I know you do. So, if you can do the same thing with Chris, in an innocent way, what's the harm?"

Lisa looked at the photo of Bill and I that I had left open on my phone. "I'll try anything to get him out of this funk. He hardly talks to me. He tries to avoid me. He has no goals in life. That kid's in a rut. What do I do?"

This question put Sarah and I in a quandary. The honest answer would be, "Give him a blowjob that will bring him to his knees," but we really couldn't tell her that.

"Just flirt with him, Lisa. You probably do it unconsciously anyway. Let him know you see him in a sexual way, and not just in a 'my little boy' way." Here Sarah was jumpstarting the whole process a little bit for Lisa. She was taking a big bite of the elephant for Chris.

"I don't know," replied Lisa. "That's a little creepy, isn't it? I don't want to send him right into therapy."

I laughed. "That's not going to happen, Lisa. He's a man now. What would more likely send him to therapy would be trying to repress his natural feelings."

"How do you keep it from going too far? I mean, these things can get out of control, can't they?"

Sarah chimed in. "Oh, I'm sure they could get out of control, if you let it. But remember, you're always in command. You let happen only what you want to happen. Don't forget, though, that you'll reach a point where you are not only Mother and Son, but also Man and Woman." At this point, Sarah took a little risk, and lowered her voice to a whisper. "And who better to have an affair with than your own son? Who would ever suspect that?"

"Sarah!," exclaimed Lisa. "Get a grip, girl. That's just creepy and perverted to think about."

Sarah again whispered. "It's only creepy if you make it creepy. I think it's the most beautiful expression of love I can imagine. Look, Lisa. If Chris needed a blood transfusion, you'd give it to him, right?"

"Sure."

"And if he needed a kidney?"

"Of course."

"You'd give him anything, wouldn't you? You'd give him your heart. You'd do anything for him. But you'd refuse the one thing he wants more than he's ever wanted anything in his life?"

Lisa giggled. "Boys go through phases. We all know that. Sometimes you just have to hold on until the phase passes."

We let that conversation kind of die out, and then I asked Lisa how her backyard garden project was going. She became animated as she described it. Lisa loved gardening, and could make a botanical paradise out of a desert.

When we parted, Sarah took Lisa's arm. "Let that flower bloom, Lisa."

Her comment seemed apropos to nothing. What flower was she talking about? But Lisa seemed to understand, and nodded. "I'll give it a shot. What do I have to lose?"