Go Burn Yourself

GO BURN YOURSELF

I am one of those bitches you guys like to see get burned. I bet a bunch of you BTB fanatics have just moved on to another story. Good riddance. Until I started reading Literotica Loving Wives stories, I didn't realize how skewed the stories were against ALL those supposed millions of cheating wives. It's like how the mainstream media say they are objective in their news coverage. Bullshit. MEN CHEAT MUCH MORE OFTEN THAN WOMEN. Get your facts straight.

I am one of the bitches that got burned and, for the most part, I DESERVED IT. There are a lot more men who deserved to be burned bastards but haven't even gotten a fever blister. On behalf of the women unfairly portrayed as being the most likely to betray their marriage, I am writing my story from my own selfish, self-protecting, slanted viewpoint. So many of the BTB stories are told from men's own selfish, self-protecting, slanted viewpoint; my story won't even begin to balance the scales. After so many whiny stories from men I've read, I have wanted to shout out "GROW A SET OF BALLS." Okay, okay, I'll get to my story.

To satisfy those perverts out there, I am 5' 7" tall, slender with 32B tits and a firm, slightly large ass. Some of you men are fantasizing about how I look naked. Those of you who have your dicks out right now hoping to read a story to wank yourself by, you're out of luck. I will admit that if I had enclosed a picture of me nude, there would be white stuff all over your computer/tablet screen right now. Anyway, I screwed plenty of guys in high school and college. One guy made it to the almost engaged level. Mostly, I just wasn't ready to give up the variety of cock I enjoyed.

Once I started working, I avoided the office romances (yes, I was offered) because of the likely interference with my job. I needed the money too much. It was easier to avoid the temptation because there were few men I worked with that I could possibly be interested in and they were all married. No, that didn't stop them from propositioning me and, no, them being married would not have stopped me if they hadn't work with me.

I did the 'nights out with the girls' routine. Girls liked to have me along as a magnet. Packs of guys would approach us. The losers in the pack would thin the herd of the ugliest women so the winners of the pack could make their move on the more attractive women, especially me. A couple of guys I met this way made it to my bed, but I had experienced a better selection when I was in college. Most of the guys that hung out in bars had about as much chance of satisfaction from the assembled female as a termite has in a petrified forest.

The bar scene got old, fast. In addition, I observed that the happier women I knew were married. I decided to date for reasons beyond sex. (Opps, there go another group of readers.) I tried the dating services. If there was 'truth in advertising' in dating sites, they would advertise the male selection pool as 'boring men looking for girls who will fuck almost anyone or anything.' The better prospects were usually taken before I even had a chance. I moved on to blind dates.

I approached several of my more attractive friends who had brothers or friends of their husbands who had someone they knew 'I would really like.' After three bad dates, I finally lucked out. Brian was attractive, witty, tall, athletic, and had a good job. Some of you are saying right now, 'I bet he's gay.' You're the same guys who automatically assume a guy that's better looking than them must be gay. Go work out and get better looking or rent a hooker.

Brian's story was similar to mine. Tired of the typical dating scene. Ready to settle down. Ready to talk about children. We were in bed by the third date. He was very good in bed. I bet you want to know how big his dick was, don't you? Okay, he was a good six inches and fairly thick. You know, women aren't as hung up on that sort of thing as men are. Sure, bigger can be better but if a guy doesn't know what he's doing, a big dick can be nothing more than a big disappointment. Of course, a big dick with someone who uses it well is the ideal. For those of you with small dicks and little skills, learn how to use your tongue and marry your palm.

Brian and I dated a while longer, moved in together, and in a few more months got married. We didn't have a big wedding. Both of us wanted to spend our money on our honeymoon and getting a house. Our sex life was quite frequent, intense, and, thanks to me, loud. After several months we settled into a routine of sex three to four times a week with longer sessions on weekends.

What are the reasons why men and women have affairs? It's not the usual excuses in the Cheater's Handbook. Pay attention. I may have a quiz later.

NUMBER ONE: Biology. It's the biological fact that climaxes, orgasms, ejaculations, etc. FEEL SO GOOD. It doesn't matter that much if it is women doing men, men doing women, men doing men, women doing women, old doing young, young doing old, anyone doing animals, animals doing humans, the use of toys, machines, objects, fruits of vegetables -- you get the picture. You want to blame someone for the desire for have sex -- BLAME GOD. He probably intended for sex to be so enjoyable to keep animals (including human animals) self-perpetuating, but we like it for other reasons -- a lot. This reason is certainly enough, by itself, to prompt an affair. It is likely a major part of every other explanation for adultery. NEVER UNDERESTIMATE THE POWER OF THE HUMAN SEX DRIVE.

NUMBER TWO: Drugs and alcohol. Actually, it's the combination of Number One and Number Two that greatly increases the likelihood of extramarital sex. A strong desire with decreased inhibitions, go figure. It always makes me laugh when I read the label of my favorite liquor bottle: 'Warning: Drinking alcohol may endanger a developing fetus.' I think about the old joke that the label should read: 'Warning: You're more likely to have sex and produce a baby if you drink alcohol.' Yeah, yeah I know you've heard it before.

NUMBER THREE: True love. This reason seems too often to be discounted as a legitimate reason for being unfaithful. I have seen too many instances of this that makes me believe it happens. Sometime after marriage, one of the partners in a couple meets someone that they are totally convinced is their actual 'soul mate.' Why is that so hard to believe? Remember back to your first 'true love.' All sense and reason deserted you. You couldn't think of anything else. You were absolutely sure that the world will be out of balance if you didn't merge with your soul mate, regardless if you were married to someone else. Guess what? Having sex with that person usually 'confirms' this feeling to be true.

NUMBER FOUR: Getting even: One spouse is, or is assumed to be, having an affair, therefore, excusing the affair of the other. 'Nuff said. Revenge sex is just as desirable as pity sex, rebound sex, or any other sex.

NUMBER FIVE: Unique opportunity: With travel required in so many jobs, being away at a conference or a spouse alone at home while the other is away at a conference, usually combined with One and/or Two above, pushes the person over the line. That may be the real reason why so many businesses resist the online conferences. Sometimes a party or a vacation can provide the opportunity that makes it easier to cheat.

NUMBER SIX: Routine. This was my explanation. Eventually, boredom from routine comes to almost every marriage usually after several years of marriage. Brian and I enjoyed each other's company even when we weren't having sex. We agreed on who did what chores. Every three months we took a weekend away to re-kindle our love. I guess it was when we started talking about having children that it hit me. The purpose of having a child seemed more to reduce our boredom than to have another member of our family. That's when the idea of an affair really got started in my brain. Children require many years of commitment. An affair can last just a few minutes. Both relieve boredom.

In my case, it became less and less easy to dismiss the sexual fantasies that came into my daydreams. It became more and more frequent to plan how I could have a lover without my husband finding out. It became easier and easier to imagine that Brian might also be looking for a lover, it he hadn't already. It was easy to imagine women being attracted to him. Assuming he had a lover accelerated the growth of my justification of my having an affair with another man. I soon began to listen to the devil on my shoulder as to why an affair would not take away from my marriage or hurt Brian. An affair could be totally separate from my love for my husband. I bet most of you reading this have had similar rationalizations. Well, I acted on mine like some of you have.

Newton, or 'Newt,' was my target. He was the husband in one of the couples we socialized with. We flirted with each other as did Brian and Newt's wife. Brief kisses, hugs, and arms around waists were as far as we had gone. At a neighborhood party, I escalated the game. When I saw Newt heading to the restroom, I followed. I waited outside the restroom. There was no one in the hallway. When he came out, I pushed him up against the wall and kissed him passionately. He kissed back and soon tongues were in play. We pulled back and looked down the hallway. Newt said, "This is too dangerous a place. Let's go outside."

We found an isolated place out of sight of the partiers. Once again, we were kissing. Soon groping, squeezing and stroking were added although clothes stayed on. "Lunch, tomorrow" was our agreement.

Brian left at 10:00 for his usual golf game. Newt's wife volunteered every Saturday to serve lunch at the Salvation Army. I don't want to hear any of that 'how could you betray a sister' garbage. I bet she would have screwed Brian if the right opportunity came up. Newt and I had about two hours to ourselves. It took about two seconds to get our clothes off. Two more seconds to put his penis in my cunt. And, unfortunately, two seconds until he ejaculated. Okay, I thought, he'll do better in round two. But he didn't do much better the second time. He, however, was quite pleased with himself. He almost begged me for a compliment which I gave him with fake enthusiasm.

This was not what I pictured when I thought of an affair that would make me willing to risk my marriage. I gave him a 'This is a big mistake. This is not fair to our spouses. We shouldn't be doing this. We can't do this again' routine. He didn't agree. I finally had to tell him that I felt I had to tell my husband and his wife and beg their forgiveness. Both his hope and his penis shriveled quickly. He made me promise not to tell.

I waited for several weeks to see if any lightening bolts from heaven would come crashing down on me. I upped my game in bed with Brian to ease the guilt. He seemed a little perplexed at my increased sexual appetite. I wondered if I had gone a little overboard. I thought he was becoming more distant and sarcastic with me. Maybe I was making him suspicious. I cut back. Soon, I didn't think much of it, and I assumed we were back to the usual routine. I figured I was safe to start looking around again for Lover # 2.

One day, I was sitting at my desk at work when a man approached my desk, "Alisha Conners?"

"Yes."

"You've been served."

"Oh shit!" My first reaction was not that I should not have cheated. Instead my initial thought was: 'Damn. Only one time and I had been caught. What rotten luck!' I took off the rest of the day.

In a restaurant booth at a time when there were few people, I looked over the divorce petition. Brian was either madder than I had believed, or his lawyer was going to start out high and make me bargain to get back to the usual 50/50. I offered an apology and requested counseling. Rejected. I asked for alimony but was willing to sell the house and split the almost non-existent equity. Rejected. I demanded to live in the house with a minimal housing support. Rejected.

I asked for a meeting with Brian on the pretext that I was willing to make a deal if he would only hear me out. He agreed to listen. Actually, it was more like he agreed to be in the same room with me while I talked. I didn't do the usual 'I'm sorry, I don't know why, I made a one-time mistake, It was only sex' cheater's list of excuses. It would have made no impression on him. I choose different tactics.

"Brian, I foolishly took the risk and now I have to pay the consequences. I don't deny that. The question is: Is divorce the proper punishment for a one-time stupid act on my part? Let me ask you this: when did you find out about me and Newt?"

"A few months after it happened, I guess. His wife was the one who told me after she found out and psychologically castrated Newt. She called me to spread her misery. She succeeded."

"During that time before you found out, did you suspect anything?"

"No, I was caught totally by surprise. I had total faith in my loving wife. How foolish."

"If you did not notice anything different about our relationship, that means you were not feeling deprived in any way."

"You violated your vow to 'forsake all others.'"

"No, I didn't. That vow, to me, meant that I would forsake 'loving' all others. I kept true to that vow. I didn't love him then. I don't love him now. I only love you. I only had sex with him. You still had all my love and you've admitted you did not notice any difference. You still got sex like you always did from me, maybe more. You were never harmed. You're too important to me. It's no big deal to me to stop."

"It's a big deal to me that you started." He was too hurt to compromise. Most men still have little boy egos.

We went to war, but I was basically unarmed. He and his parents were willing to pay the lawyer to fight. I had no such support. I had to settle for less than the fifty percent I would have probably gotten for fighting longer but lawyer fees would have taken the gain. I settled for a one-time, lump sum payment along with my car and my personal items. Soon I was in a dinky apartment in a suspect neighborhood. That means every other neighbor I had was listed as a suspect for some crime in the last six months.

I didn't lose my job. I did get an increase in proposals from the losers in our office. Unfortunately, one of the proposals was a 'you have to put out to keep your job' from my boss, that fat, greasy bastard. At least, it was only once a week. I started looking for another job as soon as possible. The problem was listing references. Everyone wanted to talk with my current employer.

I wound up accepting a worse paying job, but with a nice, female boss. I wound up accepting the marriage proposal of the first schmuck with a little bit of money who didn't ejaculate within ten seconds of intercourse. I had a decent house and regular, safe sex. I had no intention of cheating on him, but I admit I would still be open to a better deal if it was a lot better. And no, I'm not taking applications from anyone reading my story.

So far, you're probably thinking that there was nothing wrong with the scales of justice in my case. I cheated. I got punished. Ah, but that's not the end of the story. (I just had an image of Paul Harvey coming up from his grave.)

About three months after I got divorced, I ran into a friend who had been in the same circle of friends as Brian and I had socialized with. He saw me eating alone in a fast food joint and joined me. Our talk soon focused on our respective spouses. When I remarked that Brian and I were now divorced, he said, "So, you finally found out about Brian and Brenda?"

I almost snorted my drink out my nose. "What?"

"Brian and Brenda. His secretary. He almost got fired when someone walked in his office and Brenda was laying on top of his desk and Brian was behind her pounding away. Everyone at the office knew. We figured Brenda must have been bonking their boss too for both of them to be able keep their jobs."

"When . . . when did that occur? It must have been after our divorce."

"He was shagging her soon after she got the job. I would say less than a year after you two got married. As far as I know, he's still doing her. I hear she even had to get an abortion. Her sap of a husband fell for her 'miscarriage' story while she said she was visiting her mother out-of-state. I figured you knew all this. I guess since you guys divorced it doesn't matter now."

"Oh, it matters." Just when I thought I couldn't feel any lower about myself, my ex was able to take me down another notch. Made me wonder if there was another shock waiting out there for me. Once again in my case, the man won. All I can say now is 'Kudos to all those women who have an affair and get away with it or took their husband to the cleaners in a divorce. I apologize to my sisters for my failure. We still have a long way to go to even the odds on the men.'

THE END

Tell the truth. When you read my husband had cheated on me while condemning my tryst, there was no support from you for me gaining delayed revenge. If it had been the other way around where he had cheated on me and I had cleaned him out in the divorce, you would have screamed for revenge when he found out later, I had been cheating first. Hypocrites.

Now, assholes, go ahead and give this story the same score as the size of your dick in inches.