Firestorm Pt. 01

Part One

Ellie: You up?

I stared at the message on the screen. I knew it was from her before I'd even picked up my phone. No one else ever texted me this late at night... Per usual, I froze up before replying to her.

I let my eyes linger on the three dots that were appearing and disappearing. I wondered what she was typing and deleting. I didn't even really need to answer her question. She already knew I was still awake, the little 'Read' had surely shown up on her end by now. Could this finally be the night I actually exercised self-control? Was I going to be able to resist her? Break the hold she had on me?

Of course not. The fight was lost as soon as I'd heard the familiar text chime and picked up my phone from the nightstand. I groaned as I kicked off my blanket, annoyed at myself and my unfaltering predictability. I rubbed the sleep out of my eyes. Of course I was going to see her... But I'd at least keep my promise to myself and not let her touch me.

"Yay for small victories," I sarcastically remarked in my empty room.

Me: On my way.

I replied, my fingers only pressing on three letters while autocorrect finished the job. I covered myself up with just an extra-long hoodie that reached halfway down my thighs. I slipped my sock-clad feet into my pair of slides. I didn't bother with my purse, but I made sure my keys were in my front pocket before leaving. I looked like a mess and I was definitely not dressed to be in public, but it was fine, the commute to my destination was a short one.

Actually, it was only going to take one elevator ride and sixteen steps.

She sent back a red heart and I rolled my eyes. I'd gone to her place like a hundred times by now, but every single time I rode the elevator to hers, my skin still heated up and butterflies still filled my stomach. I'd never felt like this about anyone else. Before her, I didn't even know it was possible for someone to have had this much of a hold over another person.

I caught my reflection in the mirror as the elevator shot up. I didn't even take the time to fix my dark brown hair. I'd convinced myself that these little acts of 'not making an effort' anymore meant I was slowly but surely getting over her. The digital floor number rose higher and higher until the metal doors opened to her floor of our shared apartment building.

I made the sixteen steps to the familiar wooden door, which I'd recently come to regard as the gate to my own personal heaven and hell. I pressed on the buzzer and I felt my mouth dry up. My brain had already let my body know what was coming, and as usual, I was no longer in control of either my heart rate or breathing.

For fuck's sake, I hadn't even seen her yet, but I already felt like I could've melted away at any second. I drummed my fingers against the back of my phone. I truly wasn't sure if I was ever going to get through one of these nights without feeling like a bumbling idiot.

"Hi," Ellie greeted me as she let me in her home. She planted a quick kiss on my cheek. It burned. "Sorry, I know it's like super late, but I just couldn't sleep." She shrugged. The playfulness in her bright, blue eyes told me she wasn't really sorry. She stood in front of me, smiling as she took in my appearance from head to toe.

For a split second, I regretted my ultra-casual outfit choice, especially since she was wearing another one of her expensive silk robes. Her golden blond hair neatly flowed past her shoulders. As always, she looked like an angel. Well, an angel whose matching lacy underwear was peeking out and making it even harder for me to form words.

Once again, I wondered how someone could look so perfect. My eyes took in her features greedily. As if I hadn't already committed every single thing I knew about her to my memory.

"Hey, no problem," I replied. I was trying my best to make my smile reach my eyes. "So... Where do you wanna do this tonight?" I looked around her dimly lit living room. I knew that if we kept eye contact any longer, I was bound to say something stupid. I was about to step toward the L-shaped couch in the corner when she grabbed my arm.

"Are you okay, babe?" The term of endearment felt like a stab to my heart.

"I'm fine." I bared my teeth in a grin, hoping it made me seem more convincing. I rubbed the back of my neck and looked into her eyes again. "Just had a long day at work."

"Well, if you're tired—"

"Ellie, I'm already here, aren't I?"

I covered her hand on my arm with my own before removing it. She opened her mouth to say something else, but I crashed my lips against hers before she could. I didn't want to talk to her anymore.

I blindly led us to the couch. My lips never left hers. It was easy to do since I'd memorized the path already by heart. I could've probably walked forward or backward to any of our 'sex spots' in her apartment even if it was pitch black. Which was a good thing since her place was full of expensive furniture and décor I couldn't afford to replace.

I sat her down on the couch. I climbed on top of her and kissed her into the dark gray faux suede cushions. Our kiss was deep and our movements were rushed. Well, my movements were rushed. I felt her try to slow the pace a couple of times, but I wouldn't let her. I tore open her robe and slipped it halfway down her shoulders in one motion. My left hand swiftly reached for her boobs as my right one slipped under her panties.

She wasn't wet enough for what I really wanted to do to her, so I pumped the brakes, deciding instead to play with her for a while. I kept kissing her as I did, loving the feeling of her breathing getting more and more shallow as I teased her. My muscle memory when it came to what she liked was incredibly sharp.

In minutes, I felt her juices flowing freely. I continued my efforts. Alternately playing with her nipples the way that she liked with one hand, while my other one soldiered on to make sure she was more than ready for the quick and hard fuck she was going to get.

"Mm—" She murmured against my lips before finally breaking the kiss. "Really not in the mood for foreplay tonight, huh?" Her cheeks were flushed pink and her eyes were sparkling.

I knew I could've made her come in a bit just by rubbing her sex some more, but if I did that... I would've still wanted to fuck her nice and deep. And I was really trying to limit the night to one orgasm given how late it was. I also wanted to spend as little time around her as possible.

"Nope." I popped out the word at the same time as I smoothly slipped two fingers inside her. She was absolutely dripping. I bit the inside of my cheek to stop myself from expressing out loud how I'd never get tired of fucking her like this. I'd always found her tightness and wetness so hypnotic. It was as if my only choice was to surrender to her, to give her what she wanted, every single time we had sex.

I cut myself some slack and stared at her for a few seconds. I allowed my eyes to take in the sight of her flawless face scrunched up in ecstasy. How her eyelids were shut tight. How her white teeth were sinking into her pink bottom lip.

When it started to hurt to look at her, I pressed my lips onto her neck and collarbone. I covered her ivory skin with kisses as I pumped in and out of her. Really deep and fast. I knew she wasn't going to last very long. I thought about slowing down, about making it last just a little bit longer. But then a little voice in my head reminded me I wasn't even supposed to be there in the first place. So, I sighed and let my thumb join in the fun, rubbing circles around her clit as I continued to thrust my fingers into her.

She came undone in no time and I fought the urge to look at her face again. I didn't stop touching her. I let her ride out her orgasm for as long as possible before gently pulling out of her. Instinctively, I stuck my fingers in my mouth, relishing her taste.

"Fuck me," she sighed out. Her breathing was heavy. But she looked relaxed, serene.

"Just did," I quipped with a grin before sliding backward and away from her. She reached out for me, but I just pulled even further away. I made a show out of standing up and stretching my arms above my head.

"Hannah—" She sat up and readjusted what she was wearing. Everything was disheveled, but at least her clothes were still on her. We were both fully clothed. "What's going on?"

"Nothing's going on," I said lamely. "Like I said, work was a bitch and I'm super tired, so I guess I'm just not in the mood."

"Then why'd you even come over?" She didn't bother to hide the fact that she was annoyed at me.

I shook my head. "I meant I'm not in the mood to get off... Seriously, I'm fine," I explained. I then looked her straight in the eye. "But Ellie, I'm always in the mood to fuck you." The way I said it made it sound lighthearted, casual, but it was one of the truest truths I'd ever known.

Ellie: Thanks for last night... Really needed that.

I was thankful that technology made it possible to just react to text messages. I gave Ellie's little thank-you text a quick thumbs-up instead of an actual reply, clearly 'not making an effort.' Unfortunately, last night was the exact opposite of what I'd needed... Neither emotionally nor physically. As further evinced by the fact that I couldn't keep my eyes open in the office despite the numerous cups of coffee I downed.

Ellie wouldn't let up until I was out her door last night. She'd asked me again and again why I was being weird. And I just repeatedly told her I wasn't being weird. I kept denying that anything was amiss. I knew she didn't believe me, but what could I have possibly said to her?

"Oh, well, you see... I know I said I was cool with this set-up of ours, but apparently, I caught real feelings for you. And now, everything hurts way too much. My bad!"

If I told Ellie that—if she found out... She would've surely wanted to end things. And despite all my promises to myself that I was going to stop being her little plaything, I knew it would've absolutely destroyed me if she completely cut me off. I wasn't ready for that yet. I was still holding out hope that my confusingly painful feelings would miraculously go away or at least fade into something more tolerable. And I could've gone back to just blissfully fucking around with my smoking hot goddess of a neighbor.

I wished and hoped that my brain would somehow rewire itself into thinking: 'Hey, actually, you know what... This isn't so bad!'

It wasn't completely outside the realm of possibility... At the start, sex with Ellie was always so fun, so intoxicating. Being with her used to feel like I was in the earliest stages of a great high, knowing that I was definitely heading toward a peak that'd ignite every single one of my senses.

I thought back to how things had first started, back to how we met. If I knew then that all of this was going to end up hurting me so goddamn much, would I still have opened my mouth in the elevator? Yeah, probably. Because if I hadn't, I would've missed out on all the amazing things, too.

Eight months earlier...

I frowned at the sight of two women blocking the entrance to my apartment building. They were clearly in the middle of some argument. I paused the music I was listening to. I planned to say a polite 'excuse me,' so I could get home. Right before I found my voice, the blond-haired woman abruptly turned and stomped into the building. She just left the other woman angrily staring at her.

In moments, I found myself in the same elevator as 'Little Miss Abandoner.' I tried to bite my tongue. I should've bit my tongue. I didn't bite my tongue.

"Girlfriend troubles?"

"What?" She sounded curt, but I couldn't blame her. She was clearly riled up by whatever I'd witnessed outside. Her blue eyes landed on me and everything seemed to get just a little bit warmer. "She's not my girlfriend."

"Oh." I hid my smile by looking away. "I'm sorry, I just thought—"

"Apparently, she did, too." The pretty woman rolled her eyes. "Why are the hot ones always so crazy?" The little drama show outside made me think she was gay, but I was glad for the confirmation.

Her statement had me chuckling. I looked at her, taking everything in. Her shoulder length blond hair, her impossibly blue eyes, her porcelain-like skin. She was maybe two to three inches taller than my 5'4". There was something about her. I knew from the jump that she would've been able to stand her ground anywhere, against anyone. It was the way she carried herself.

"If that's true, then you're probably batshit bonkers, huh?" I flirted shamelessly before tucking some of my hair behind my right ear. Could anyone blame me? I just found out she was probably single... Nothing ventured, nothing gained, right?

She grinned in response before finally really looking at me. "Hi, I'm Ellie." She extended her right hand which I shook. The contact was brief, but it was at least long enough for me to notice how soft her skin was.

"Hannah. I—" I introduced myself before getting cut off by the elevator doors sliding open to my floor. "This is me..." I disappointedly stepped out. "I guess I'll see you around."

She gave me a quick wave goodbye and I silently cursed at how short our time together was.

"Hey, you."

I looked up from my phone and directly into blue orbs. Ellie was getting on the elevator, a couple of grocery bags in her arms. Despite being neighbors, it'd taken more than two weeks before we ran into each other again.

"Hannah." I reminded her what my name was.

"I remember, silly." She laughed and I couldn't help but grin back like an idiot. She remembered me. "You're the girl who said I was batshit bonkers."

"I feel like context is really important here," I replied. I wondered if my smile could've gotten any bigger. "Just don't forget when I called you crazy, I was also calling you hot." I knew I was being more forward with my flirting this time around, but she'd unknowingly taken up a lot of my thoughts since I first saw her.

She tilted her head. Her expression was equally playful and amused. She didn't seem bothered at the slightest by my blatant flirting. I bet people hit on her all the time... She was seriously gorgeous. I was about to say something else stupid when she swiped my phone out of my hands. She did something then quickly handed it back to me.

"What—" Before I could finish my question, the elevator doors slid open to my floor. I sighed at the fact that our conversation was getting cut short yet again. My obvious disappointment seemed to just add to her amusement.

"Just text me."

I stepped out and she gave me another quick wave. I looked at my phone's screen and saw that she'd added herself to my contacts under 'Ellie (Hot but Bonkers).' To answer my earlier question... Yes, it was apparently possible for my smile to get even bigger. A lot bigger, actually.

Ellie and I had been texting on and off for about a week. I'd learned that she wasn't just a pretty face. She was also quick and witty (and oh so funny). The more I talked to her, the more my crush on her grew. Whenever she said something flirty, it was as if my cheeks were set on fire. Every interaction I had with her always left me feeling giddy.

My phone chimed and I grinned when I saw who the message was from.

Ellie: What are you up to tonight?

Me: Nothing much, just staying home.

I'd hesitated before sending the last text. It was a Friday and I was worried that my non-plans made me seem boring. I was by no means a 'homebody,' but work had been gruesome, so I'd declined my friends' invites to grab a drink to celebrate the weekend. Opting to just get some rest. When I didn't get a reply, I double texted.

Me: You?

It took quite some time for her to write back, but when she finally did, I didn't like what I read. I felt a pang of jealousy then a pang of sadness in quick succession. I shook my head. I reminded myself that I had no business feeling either of those emotions.

Ellie was just a friend. A new friend. We didn't even really know each other.

Ellie: On a date. It's not really going too well.

I locked my phone without replying and ignored it for the rest of the night. Even if her date wasn't going well, I didn't need to hear about her being with someone else. I got ready for bed and tried my best to not think about her.

When I woke up the next day, I saw that I had two unread messages from the woman I'd tried (and failed) to stop thinking about the night prior. For the briefest of moments, I thought about just ghosting her, cutting my losses before I had any more unwarrantedly intense reactions.

Ellie: You up?

Ellie: Talk to you tomorrow then.

The second text had come in a lot later and it had a red heart at the end. I groaned. I knew it was futile, there was no way I was going to stop talking to her just because I got irrationally jealous. I liked talking to her, I liked how I felt when I was talking to her. I was definitely attracted to her, but that didn't mean I couldn't be friends with her, right?

Me: Hey, sorry. I passed out. How was the date? Did it get better?

Her replies came immediately and I found myself sitting up straighter on my bed.

Ellie: No. It was supposed to be dinner and drinks, but I bailed right after dinner.

Ellie: Still wanted that drink, but the friend I was planning to invite apparently passed out.

There was a winky face in the mix and I felt my heartbeat getting faster. I couldn't understand why I found everything she said so electric. No, that wasn't the right adjective... Her words were—incendiary. Every interaction we had seemed to be a precursor to something explosive.

Me: What's wrong with this friend of yours? Who in their right mind would turn down a chance to spend some time with you?

I played along, sending out a heart-eyed smiley.

Ellie: Mm, not sure, you know what they say about the hot ones...

I dropped my phone onto my bed before burying my face in my pillow and groaning. I felt crazy. I couldn't stop smiling. It was too early in the day to be as giddy as I was. I replied with an equally flirty message then forced myself out of bed. I needed to go on a nice, long run to clear my head.

I brushed my teeth, washed my face and then stripped off my sleeping clothes. I took a moment to examine myself in my bathroom mirror. My tanned skin had a golden glow, my brown eyes were larger than average, my straight dark brown hair was nice and thick. I was okay. I compared my features to Ellie's. Her boobs were definitely bigger than mine, but based on the little I'd seen, I assumed I was a bit more toned than her. There was no contest though. She was leaps and bounds hotter than I was, leaps and bounds hotter than anyone else I knew.

And yet, she thought I was hot, huh?

It wasn't that I thought I was unattractive or ugly. I knew I did my best to take care of myself. It was just that the compliment had come from Ellie, so it was kind of like Einstein calling someone else smart.

My whole run was plagued with thoughts of everything I liked about her.

I really shouldn't have let Ellie order us a fourth round. It was a Tuesday night. But she'd somehow convinced me it'd be a good idea to go with her to a lesbian bar within walking distance of our apartments (despite my reservations and excuses). I'd never really been much of a drinker, so the three drinks I'd already had were more than plenty. Combine the alcohol with whatever effect she naturally had on me, it felt like my entire planet was spinning... Well, the planet was always spinning, but it was spinning—Faster? In reverse? I was wasted and I knew it.