Finding Goddess Ch. 14

Wednesday came and Carol decided she wasn't going to go to work. She had a lot on her mind and wanted to take some time off to think about what she was doing and how to prepare herself for it. She was converting to a religion she had only just learned about barely a week ago, felt she was scraping the surface of a history she never knew about before, and was going to live completely buck-ass naked for the rest of her life. She would have a lot of explaining to do. To her neighbors. To her landlord. To the people at the office. To various members of her family. To...her daughters. And truth is, she didn't have the foggiest idea where to even begin.

Would they all accept her decision and her fulltime nudist lifestyle? Would she be evicted from her apartment? Would she still have her job? Should she consider looking for a new residence and place of employment just in case? Would Mindy and Erin cope with having to see their mother naked all the time? Question after question piled up in Carol's mind, so many that they were starting to suffocate her.

Alright, let's just take it one step at a time, she thought as she stopped her pacing and sat down on the couch. Before I think about what will happen when I convert, I have to know...how do I convert to Zenrism in the first place?

It looked like now was the time for Carol to go to the Zenrists' website. So after informing the office that she was calling in sick for the day, the mother went to her bedroom and cracked open her laptop. The website was, well, generally what she expected it to be. It had a lot of nude imagery. Tons and tons and tons of pictures of girls doing stuff naked. Walking around in public, swimming in pools, drinking in bars, and even some going to class as both students and teachers. And yes, there were even images of girls engaging in more...sexual acts. Often in public. And there even appeared to be a section on the site for videos. If Carol didn't know any better, she would have thought she stumbled on another porn site, much like the one that specialized in nude-in-public erotica that she had been getting herself hot to last week.

She fought the temptation to browse the videos. Carol was here for information, not titillation, and if she started watching movies of girls walking around naked and having sex in public, she'd likely spend the rest of the day abusing her poor flower.

She did catch one interesting link leading to a questionnaire titled "Is Zenrism Right for Me?" She already knew the answer to that, but decided it wouldn't hurt just to try it out. Many of the questions it asked were expected. "I am nudist." "I am an exhibitionist." "I hate clothing." "I have vestiphobia." "I want to be naked all the time." "I want to be naked everywhere." "I don't want to do laundry ever again." Carol couldn't help but grin in amusement at how many questions pertained to one's feelings for clothing and nudity, but it seemed whoever made this quiz had considered them all.

Not everything was about nudity though. There were a lot of questions about relationships and sexuality as well. "I'm looking for love." "I'm lonely." "I want to meet more lesbians or bisexual women like me." "I just got dumped or divorced." "I want to experiment with lesbianism." "I'm looking for someone to share my specific kink with."

Then there were questions about life and spirituality. "I feel like there's something missing in my life." "I'm sad and depressed." "I'm having a crisis of faith." "My family is growing distant." "I'm having suicidal thoughts." Carol couldn't help but bite her lip nervously at some of them. Did girls really convert to Zenrism to save themselves or their families? And was the faith able to help them?

But then there were other questions. Odd questions that Carol honestly had no idea how or why they applied to Zenrism. "I want to be beautiful forever." "I want to add years to my life and life to my years." "I live in a climate that's too hot." "I live in a climate that's too cold." "I'm terminally ill." "I want to be faster and stronger." "I hate it when I have my period." "I want to save money on heat and/or air conditioning." More than one question made Carol raise an eyebrow, but she nevertheless answered them honestly. Who wouldn't want to be beautiful forever, faster, stronger, have a long life, or cut down on expenses?

After submitting her answers, the questionnaire tallied things up and returned a very high score for Carol, saying that she most definitely should convert to Zenrism right now!

"Can't say I'm surprised, but I guess that was an amusing use of my time. Hm, what's this?"

A new link appeared on the results page, saying "Take the Initiation Test." Idly, Carol clicked it and came to a new page. It was a lot less friendly, casual, and...sexy than the rest of the site. There was a distinct lack of color and naked female flesh. It was just a long stretch of cold black letters on a sterile white background, like what you would see on a final exam in high school or college.

"It really is starting to feel like I'm taking a test," she mused. "Well, might as well see what it's all about."

She filled up the top portion of the page, which asked for some of her personal details like her name and email address. Then she read the first question. "What is the First Tenet of Zenrism?"

Tenets of Zenrism? Carol didn't remember seeing anything about the Tenets of Zenrism. She must not have read that far in the Scripture. Nevertheless, the nude woman decided to at least wing it. What was the worst that could actually happen?

'The Zenrist must forever honor the Goddess and Her creation in all its perfection. Woman is the creation of the Goddess, and therefore she is perfect. Woman is made in the image of the Goddess, and therefore she is perfect. To bear the image of the Goddess is to bear that which is most beautiful, and to hide it is to spit upon all that the Goddess stands for and all that She has made. The Zenrist must never wear vestments and must bare her body forevermore, and let all who gaze upon it marvel in its perfection.'

Carol shivered as she finished typing her answer. That was...that was not how it felt to bullshit an answer to a test she had not studied for. Carol did not know the words the test was looking for, and yet the moment she started typing, they just flowed out of her like water from a faucet. And her text...it was written in that almost poetic prose that the Scripture typically used. Almost as if she was reciting it.

"N-next question," she mumbled, deciding to see what else the test wanted her to say. "What is the Second Tenet of Zenrism?"

'The Zenrist must abide to the purpose of which she was created for. Zenriah made Woman to love Her, and so it is Woman's duty to love Zenriah. Woman is made in Zenriah's image, and so it is Woman's duty to love Woman as well. To pleasure and feast on Woman's sacred flesh, to milk her yoni, to caress her buds and taste her lips and set her soul aflame is to give and receive the highest gift of all. The Zenrist must sexually gratify her self and her fellow women wherever and whenever they may be, and wherever and whenever they may hunger, and she must do so decisively and without shame.'

"I'm not even stopping to think about what I write," Carol mumbled as she finished typing her latest answer. "It's like I already know the answers. Okay, next question...what is the Third Tenet of Zenrism?"

'The Zenrist will not restrict who she will love and how many she will love. Woman was made to love the Goddess and all She created, and Woman is all the Goddess created. To not love and to not accept another Woman's love and to keep another woman for herself is to starve her self and to starve her sisters of that which they need to survive. The Zenrist must be polyamorous, ready to marry many wives and share all she has and all she is. For all women are Zenriah's, and all women are Woman's.'

One last question remained. "Why do we follow the Tenets of Zenrism?"

'To not follow the Tenets is to forget them. To forget the Tenets is to forget the Goddess. And without the Goddess, we are but cinders, doomed to fade and die, our divinity and our holy souls lost in the darkness forevermore.

'For only by abiding to our Goddess' Tenets may we connect and commune with Her. And as long as we commune with Her, we know that She is with us, and that we are with Her, even as We exist in worlds apart. The love that exists between Goddess and Woman is a love that transcends both time and space. And as long we love the Goddess, so too will the Goddess love us in turn. Always and forever.'

"Always...and forever." Carol's fingers trembled as she finished typing and her heart kicked with every syllable she put from key to screen. A warm tear rolled down her cheek. Was she crying? She was!

Carol shook her head, as though she was trying to shake the rogue thoughts out of it as though they were flies buzzing around her. It didn't work. Does the Goddess...really love me? And do I...really love Her? I don't know Her! I've never met Her! I don't even know that She exists!

She clutched a hand over her left breast and squeezed it slightly, digging her fingers into the sensitive flesh, which pulsed and shook with her still rapidly beating heart. Then why...do I still want Her?

Well, it didn't matter. She completed the test. The only thing left to do now was submit it and see where things went from there. So she did just that. A message popped up on her screen, thanking her for her time, informing her that it would be looked over by a Zenrist priestess as soon as possible, and telling her to check her email later to see what her results would be. It also recommended that she take the time to enjoy all the other features the site had to offer, linking specifically to the video section as if the page itself was giving her a wink and a nudge.

You sure are pushy for a webpage. But fine, if you really want me to watch your videos...

She nearly balked when she clicked the link. In a matter of seconds, her entire screen was filled with thumbnails, each promising to show her a sexy, high-quality adventure of naked Zenrists doing what naked Zenrists did. There had to be dozens of these videos, possibly hundreds, and they were just giving them away for free? This was like a teenage boy's dream come true! Or a horny middle-aged woman's.

But where do I start...wait, what's this video? 'Sacred Gathering at the Beach?' That looks promising.

It was. On a sandy beach, against the backdrop of crashing waves, a large group of women gathered. They were all fit, they were all gorgeous, and most of all, they were all naked. And on all of them, on various parts of their bodies, was the distinct tattoo of the Goddess' Sigil, marking them all as women of the faith. They gathered in a circle and knelt down in the sand, embracing one another, holding each other tightly. Some ran their hands down the lengths of their lovers' bodies. Some began to kiss. Some began to lay down, and others started to climb atop.

Then came the groping, the suckling, and the rubbing. And before Carol knew it, they were all having sex with one another.

So hot...so amazingly sexy.

They melted into one another, a great heaving, throbbing mass of feminine flesh that pulsed as if it were a singular living thing. Breasts jiggled, legs splayed in the air, and buttocks clenched and quivered everywhere. And all around them, people gathered. Ordinary people, clothed people. They stood a respectable distance around the naked lesbians as they rolled and rubbed and thrust and jolted against one another. Some had cameras out. Some were recording the proceedings on their phones. If the Zenrists had any problems with their intrusions, they made no sign of it. Then again, they didn't seem aware of anything. Every last girl and woman in that pile was in her own world, where only they existed. They, their sisters, their lovers, their orgasms, and their Goddess.

Carol began to stroke her groin, caressing her dampening clit.

Somewhere to the side, off-camera, a voice that sounded oddly familiar said: "What's going on here? What is this?"

Someone pushed through the crowd. A slender-looking girl in her late teens, with long black hair and a striking black bikini. She nearly fell backward when her eyes fell upon the mass of condensed sapphica.

"What the hell!"

Another girl appeared next to her, a tall blonde of similar age, with an especially gifted chest that would fill out an E-sized bra if she was wearing one. Which she wasn't, or anything else for that matter. She was naked, just like the orgy of lesbians writhing within the circle before her.

"This is a miracle," she said, looking at her raven-haired companion. "This is what we are all about, Erin."

***

Carol leaned back in her chair, sweaty, wet, and very satisfied. That video of the "Gathering" had been hot, possibly the hottest piece of lesbian porn she had ever watched. Dozens of naked women coiling and twisting around each other like a hive of serpents on a lovely beach as people all around looked on...what could possibly top that? Nothing about it was staged either; those were real women having real sex in a real orgy, eliciting real moans, having real orgasms, and really enjoying it. It was so intense, so carnal to watch, she almost felt like she was there, especially as she started to rub her clit, stroke her dripping folds, and slip more and more of her fingers inside.

The only thing that gave her a slight pause was the startled appearance of the girl named Erin. Even in her post orgasmic bliss, Carol couldn't help but frown and furrow her brow as she thought about her. Surely, that couldn't have been her Erin...could it? No, it couldn't have been. There were plenty of girls named Erin in the world, it wasn't that uncommon a name, and more than enough of them would be beachgoers. And that video could have been recorded on any beach, it didn't necessarily have to be someplace at Duny, where her girls had gone. She also didn't recognize the girl's naked friend; Erin knew plenty of blondes and plenty of gifted women, but none of them were as gifted as that particular blonde had been.

But who knows? Maybe Carol wasn't familiar with all her daughter's friends. Or perhaps Erin just made a new one? The video was also a new release, appearing on the site last Monday, meaning it could easily have been recorded over the weekend while her daughters were at Duny Beach.

Carol skipped back to the beginning of the video to see if she could truly identify who the mystery girl named Erin was. It was no good; she was too far away for the nude mother to properly identify her face. Worse, she honestly didn't have enough screen time; a couple people stepped forward, blocking her from view, and the camera in turn panned away from her and zoomed in on the Zenrist orgy. Carol made a few more sporadic checks on the video to see if Erin made another appearance, but alas, it seemed like the black-haired girl had disappeared.

Carol sighed. She really wanted to know who that girl was. Because if she really was her daughter, then that could potentially change how the mother's coming out announcement would proceed. How, she couldn't be sure. Would it make things easier or harder? Did Erin walk away from that experience with a newfound appreciation for what the Zenrists were, or was she disgusted by them? Did she...perhaps feel a slight urge to join the orgy, or did she just leave in a huff?

"If only I knew," Carol mumbled in frustration.

Feeling like she needed a break from the Zenrists for a little while, Carol decided to check her email to see if she got any important messages recently. As it turned out, she did; apparently, her test results had already come in.

"Dear Ms. Connors," she said, reading the message out loud. "We are delighted to inform you that you have earned a perfect score on our test, proving beyond a measure of a doubt that you are more than qualified to join our creed. The Lovers of Zenriah is an ancient order dating back tens of thousands of years that is always looking for new members, and we will be more than happy to welcome you into our ranks with open arms (and open legs! <3). To begin the next step on your road to enlightenment, please fill out the form in the following link and submit it, and you will be well on your way to becoming the Goddess' latest wife. Zenriah embrace you."

Carol chewed her lip uneasily. The next step on her road to enlightenment? Passing one little test was all it took for the Zenrists to accept her? That seemed too easy. She imagined converting to the faith would be a longer and more rigorous process that could take weeks, possibly even months. Were they really that eager to take any horny woman who spread her legs out for them?

"Let's not get ahead of ourselves," she said as she clicked the link. "I'm not a Zenrist yet. Let's see what else needs to be done."

The next page wasn't anything to get excited about, at least on the surface. It was, as the email described, a form and a drab one at that, similar to the kind of paper you would fill out at the DMV. It asked for a lot more personal information and forced Carol to pore through a lot of mind-numbing legalese. Too much to be perfectly honest, but the general purpose of the form was to add Carol to the national federal registry of active Zenrists in the country, granting her legal protection to practice the customs that were unique to the Lovers of Zenriah. That is, it would give her the freedom to be nude and sexual at all times and all places. No other religion had to put up with this nonsense, but then again, no other religion did quite the same things that Zenrism did. It was only natural that the government had to step in to grant it exceptions to decency laws that were still very much in effect.

"So this is it?" said Carol as she started to idly fill in the blanks, her fingers seeming to move on their own. She checked the boxes, initialized the statements, agreed to have read and understood the instructions, typed in her name, her street address, her date of birth, her home phone number, her cell phone number, her social security number, and so on. "I just complete this and I become a Zenrist?"

She came to the section asking for her credit card information that was needed to pay the requisite fee of 80 dollars, and without a second thought, she filled that in too. Everything was in place now. The only thing Carol had left to do was hit the submit button.

She hesitated. If she clicked that button, would that be...it? Would she be crossing the threshold of which there would be no turning back? Was this where the line was drawn dividing normal clothed woman from naked lesbian nymphomaniac? Carol's hand trembled so hard, she could hear her fingernails rattle against her mouse.

She pulled her hands away and clutched them to her chest. This was a heavy decision she was about to make, one that would change her life forever. In many ways, it reminded her of the moment, more than 20 years ago, when Robert knelt down and presented her the gold ring he bought just for her. Was she ready for this? Was this really what she wanted? Should she take one last moment to think it over before she committed? Should she perhaps sleep on it and make her decision in the morning?

Carol recalled the moment she started walking down the streets of New Deastone, naked as the day she was born. Passing by people and crossing roads as heads turned and eyes trailed. She recalled hiking the Vage Trail, dry one way and soaking wet on the other from both her swim and the rain.

She liked experiencing that.