Do You Love Me?

Michael sat there on the edge of the bed. He was enjoying one of his favorite pastimes. Watching his wife of 30 years as she prepared herself for an evening out for dining and then dancing. This time was different from all the others. This time while he enjoyed watching her, he was also almost overwhelmed with sadness.

"She is more beautiful today than she has ever been in all the time that I've known her", he thought.

Dawn was going to be 50 tomorrow and since they had planned a family party to celebrate her birthday with their two children and their families, tonight was going to be a private celebration for just the two of them. As she sat there at her dressing table, he deliberately let his gaze rove over her face and body.

"She's still got it!" he mused. "Gorgeous hair, beautiful face and the same trim figure that she has worked so hard over the years to maintain. And don't forget that wonderfully shaped ass that she teases me with all the time."

He felt deeply his pride and love for her and then the sadness again crept into his heart. He was a practical sort of guy. He prided himself on his analytical abilities. If there was a problem, especially at work, then he was the man to go to for the answer. It might not be the fastest answer but you could put money on the fact that it would be the most logical and well thought out answer. Which, unfortunately, is why he found himself sitting on the side of the bed, in their bedroom, watching his wife prepare for the evening out with a very heavy heart.

"Is this the last time I'll get to enjoy her doing this? I still love her with all my heart, body and soul! What did I do wrong? Why couldn't I see this coming in time to do something about it? Am I right? Do I really know her?"

The questions seemed to roll across his mind and then back again as though they were ripples across a pond. He knew that this evening was going to be the most important crossroads of his life. Taking the right turn would be either a new beginning for him or the end of his life, as he now knew it.

He had been planning for this for over two weeks now and tonight was the perfect opportunity for him to conduct the most important conversation of his life between him and his wife. He had spent countless hours trying to discover just how they had reached this point in their marriage. He had discovered so many things in the last few weeks.

As his thoughts became clearer, so did so many of the signs that were clear indications that maybe they weren't the couple that everyone thought they were. Again, he sadly listed them carefully in his mind to ensure that maybe he had missed something or even misunderstood what he had concluded.

"For some months, I'm not sure exactly when it had all started, she had been distant and distracted with me. In looking back, I realized that our sex life had taken a slow but steady decline to the point of extinction. Then there were the times that she over reacted to something minor that I had done wrong and royally reamed me out. The times when she had obviously lied about where she had been and whom she had been with were especially disturbing.

The charge on her credit card for a dinner for two at Jollie's on a night that I knew I had not been with her was a clear signal to me that maybe I wasn't the only one on her mind. The last two weeks though had been the period that made my suspicions seem to be all the more real. Almost overnight she has seemed to change.

Now she is attentive to my every word and need. Now she seems to crave making love at every opportunity. Now she wants to be the wife and companion that she hasn't been for so long. What happened this time? It is maddening. I can't figure out why she changed all those months ago and I again have no clue as to why she has changed again. But in each case, it is obvious to me that neither woman is the woman that I married and loved for all these years.

Where has that wonderful, caring and loving woman gone to and can I ever find her again? Who is this woman that I don't know and what has happened to create her. I don't like either one of these two women! Well, enough is enough! It's time to get this show on the road as they say."

"Honey, I just want to tell you how much I love you and how much I love watching you." Mike said. "You are some kind of good looking babe! You know that I love and adore you. I have always loved you and I always will."

Dawn looked into her mirror at Mike's reflection with a curious look on her face, "Why thank you Mike, I don't know what prompted you to say that but I want you to know that I love you just as much!"

Dawn looked carefully at her husband "I wish I knew what has been bothering him so much lately. It seems the more I try to work at our relationship, the more withdrawn and distant he seems to be." With a mental sigh, she thought, "I just have to keep trying. I am not going to give up on us. I just love him so much and I want him to love me the same way!"

"I wonder if you really love me as much as I love you," Mike muttered softly.

"What did you say, Michael? You've been muttering a lot for the last couple of weeks. I really wish that you would speak up." Looking her in the face, he said, "I wonder of you really love me as much as I love you?" The look on her face would have been funny in most any other circumstances.

The shock of his words left her with her mouth hanging open and gasping for air. With hurt in her voice, "Why would you say something like that? How could you even possibly think anything like that much less say it out loud? Maybe you're just trying to be a smart ass but those words really hurt!"

"Honey," he said, "we really need to talk. We have a little time before we have to leave and I have some things that I want to say and a few questions for you. I don't need any answer yet but I certainly will want answers before the night is over."

"Of course you can ask me any questions that you want. I have no secrets from you because you are my husband, my soul mate." Michael almost laughed out loud. The tension in his body was so strong that he felt like a wire stretched to its utmost limit.

"Dawn, I want you to listen to me carefully. I have a number of questions and a few statements that I want you to listen to and I don't want any answers now. I would rather that you take the time during our night out to carefully think about your answers. This is going to be difficult request but you really should know that the life of our marriage depends on your truthful answers."

"Oh Shit! He wants a divorce! I had no idea things could get this bad." Dawn gasped but as her husband had requested, she kept her comments to herself.

The Michael carefully and methodically went through all of his questions and statements about his fears that something was seriously wrong with their relationship.

"First, you basically cut me out of your life for months, then for the last two weeks you act as though you are my slave and you go all out to meet my every need including any need I could want in our bedroom. Your mood swings have been spectacular and totally unpredictable. I have walked around for months as though I were treading through a minefield with your emotions ready to blow at the least misstep. You have lied to me more than once about where you have been and whom you were with. And the last nail in this old coffin of a marriage has been charges on your card for meals for two and I'm sure as hell that I wasn't with you.

So where am I going with this? I think you are having an affair. I think that your affair has recently ended and you think that you can leap from his bed back into mine.

So the questions are (1) Do you want a divorce? (2) Do you love him? (3) How many times and how many guys have you been unfaithful with? (4) Do you want to stay married and if you do, will you continue to have more affairs? And (4), what reason or reasons can you give to me that will convince me that I want to stay married to you?"

Dawn just sat there. Michael thought that she was displaying tremendous control. He had really laid a major load on her.

Dawn wasn't displaying control. She was simply speechless.

Michael rose and said, "Dawn finish getting ready and I'll meet you downstairs. We need to hurry or we'll be late for our dinner reservations. Somehow she was able to finish her preparations and meet Michael downstairs.

Somehow she was able to get through the evening and after Michael had reminded her that he wanted no further discussion about his accusations for the rest of their evening, she was able to almost enjoy the time she was spending with her husband. She did drink a little too much and by the time they returned home, she was only ready for bed and sleep.

She was mentally exhausted and with the alcohol, knew that she was in no shape to continue any discussion with her husband. So, she begged off complaining of tiredness and a headache. She quickly changed into her nightgown and got into her side of the bed. Fortunately for her, she was asleep in moments. Michael decided that putting off the discussion was for the better and wasted no time getting into bed himself. Again, he had plenty to drink as well and he was able to drift off to sleep quickly and slept soundly throughout the night.

The next morning, Michael rose first and following his shower, he went to the kitchen and began to make preparations for breakfast. First he got the coffee started since he knew from long experience that Dawn would be down shortly as she almost always was since she was not one to lay for to long in bed.

He was sitting at the table when she came into the kitchen. "Can I get you a cup of coffee? Would you like some toast or something?" "Yes I would like some coffee Michael. Thanks for the offer, but I don't think my stomach is ready for anything yet. Last night with all that was said and done and with the alcohol on top, my stomach would rather just sit this one out."

"Dawn, last night was my turn to get all this crap out on the table where we can really figure out just where we are going and if we are going to be together or not." This morning is your turn so I'm giving the floor to you. Give it your best shot and we'll see what's what."

"Michael, I have given what you said last night a great deal of thought. I heard you when you stressed the importance of being truthful and up-front with my answers.

First, I want you to know that you are the only man that I've ever loved and you are the only man I have ever slept with since our wedding day. I'm going to try to tell things in the same order as your presented them to me as best I can remember. No I do not nor have I ever wanted a divorce from you. There is no lover lurking in the background so I can easily say that I do not love this person who does not exist.

Again, I have never been unfaithful to you since we married so again, there is no army of men that I have slept with to confess to you. I want to stay married to you more than life itself and I will continue to remain faithful to you till death finally parts us. That credit card charge was simply a business dinner that you have either forgotten and worse yet that I forgot to mention to you.

Lastly, the only reason that I can give for you to want to stay married to me is that I love you. I love only you with all my heart, body and soul. I am guilty of being distant from you for a long time. And you are guilty of being distant from me as well. I believe that we both went through a dry spell in our marriage and just didn't realize it at the time.

Recently, I have begun to see again why I love you and for the last two weeks, I have been trying to smother you with my love. It has been my way to re-ignite some of the fires that we have let almost die out."

Michael looked at Dawn's face, gazing directly into her eyes. Dawn met his gaze with a calm face and did not once flinch from his direct look. "Michael, you must know that I love you and only you!"

Michael continued to look at his wife then his face slowly changed. A look of intense sadness and loss grew and grew until he looked as though he was going to simply fold into himself.

"Michael, what's wrong? Are you getting sick?" Dawn became more alarmed with each passing second. "Do I need to call 911?"

Michael finally began to talk in a low monotone voice, "Dawn, I love you with all my heart and soul. I had hoped that we could finally be honest with each other. I guess that you simply just can't or won't be honest with me. I have given you every chance because I truly wanted to remain married to you for the rest of our days."

Mike's voice began to grow stronger and a touch of anger became easier to hear in his tone, "I am certain that I've done all I could do to save our marriage and I know that you have not done your part." Michael reached into his lap and pulled out a large manila envelope and passed it across the table to his wife. "Dawn, I still love you but love is not enough and I don't want to be your husband any longer. I have filed for divorce. You need to get a lawyer and when you do, you can give him or her the number to my lawyer. I no longer want to see you or talk with you ever again. I'm going to pack some things and I'll be gone soon.

I should say that I'm sorry, but since I don't believe that you are sorry, I don't see any reason to feel that way. You have made your bed and you will now have to sleep in it without me forever."

Michael rose slowly and went directly upstairs where he began to pack some clothes and toiletries. He had already arranged a hotel room and on the advise of his attorney had made all financial arrangements necessary to begin to separate himself in all ways from his soon to be ex-wife.

Dawn didn't understand what was happening. She was so stunned by Michael's words and actions that she was unable to function. She simply sat at the kitchen table while Michael completed his packing. When he left, she continued for almost an hour to sit unmoving at the table.

Finally, she managed to drag the awful envelope to her. She opened the flap and pulled out the sheets that spelled out clearly the end of her life, as she had known with Michael. "Why didn't he believe me? Why would he think all those awful things about me? I know that we can work this out but he won't even give us a chance." Dawn looked at the paper work without reading it and then she noticed that something was still in the envelope.

It looked like a photo so she reached in and pulled it out. It was a photo of her on her hands and knees getting royally fucked from behind. The photo clearly showed that she was on her own bed and in her own home. The photo also clearly showed that the man plowing her pussy with his dick was not Michael!

A cry escaped from her lips. She realized that Michael knew. She had thought that she had lied so carefully and so artfully about her affair with Phil and that Michael would believe her. She had ended the affair and was honestly trying to repair the damage she had done to her marriage and her husband.

She had not realized then as she did now that the only way she could have saved her marriage was by being painfully and truthfully honest. Of course since she had been cheating on her husband, honestly and truthfulness were not among her more sterling personal qualities.

The bitterest pill of all was that her husband was gone and would never return. She was sure that Michael would keep his word and that divorce was the only solution that he would find acceptable. She was also sure that she really had lost the only man she truly loved.

The last sorry fact was that the affair with all its wonderful sex and not been worth a single moment of time that she had spent with her husband. "To have and to hold, in sickness and in health, forsaking all others!" This was the final arrow that drove into her heart and finally gave her some of the pain that her husband had been experiencing for the last weeks. This pain could not compare to his but it was the most intense pain she had ever felt.

She knew that she was a cheater. She had cheated her husband, their children and all of their family. She would be a cheater now and for the rest of her life! All of her family would look at her and only see the letter A!